Ever heard the saying "all parents want to throw the baby out the window at some point"? Well, it's true. And nap time today was one of those times.
I had already tried to get Aveline to sleep in her crib with no avail, so I put her in her swing. That calmed her down at least somewhat and after a little while she fell asleep. I was worried she would wake up though, so I went to see about transferring her to her crib. At that point I realized she had pooped in her diaper. I feel bad for babies sitting in poop, so even though I knew she'd wake up I changed her diaper anyway.
I hoped she'd go back to sleep easily once I put her in her crib and gave her the pacifier. For whatever reason she was being very stubborn. I had already done this once within the hour and I was just tired. I was trying to force her to take the pacifier and it wasn't working. So, I left the room and closed the door and hoped that her crying wouldn't wake up Lily who was napping in the room next door. After a few minutes of hoping she'd calm down on her own and go to sleep I decided I better go try again.
Again she wasn't taking the pacifier. I was so upset I wanted to launch the pacifier at her head and storm out of the room. In that moment I knew I was frustrated and that being frustrated and trying to force the pacifier wasn't going to work. But, I also knew that I didn't have it in me to do any better (I think sometimes three months of not enough sleep can do that to a person). So I said a silent prayer, "God, please just make her go to sleep (so I don't beat her)." And then I was able to get her to take the pacifier and she did go to sleep, fast.
In times of crisis like these I often struggle on my own without praying for help. Sometimes I may not think of it, but usually that's not the case. I don't know if it's because I'm afraid that my prayer will go unanswered or if I just feel like I should handle things on my own. Either way, I am glad that I decided to pray this time and I am so thankful that that prayer was answered.
As an added bonus, when I left Aveline's room I checked on Lily and she was still fast asleep.
I think for me there's the fear that the prayer wont be answered. Sometimes it is, and things go as I ask, and sometimes not and so I feel like if I don't ask, then I wont be disappointed when I don't get the answer/thing I want. Still having them answered, and so quickly, like this instance, is great for your faith and a reminder to ask, cause it's prolly better to ask maybe get an answer than not ask at all.
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